Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever been a stripper?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever been to a strip club.
Oh—you wouldn’t date a girl who’s ever done porn?
In that case, I wouldn’t date a guy who’s ever watched porn.
You’re the reason we exist.
You’re the demand to our supply.
If you disdain sex workers, don’t you dare consume our labor.
As they say in the industry, “People jack off with the left hand and point with the right.”
When you have to pee but someone’s in the bathroom
When you feel crumbs under your blankets
When there’s nothing in the fridge
When everyone’s singing Happy Birthday to you
When you have to fart but there’s too many people
When there’s dirty dishes
The feeling after you eat Mcdonalds
When you step in water while wearing socks
When you’re home alone and you hear a noise
There is now a measles outbreak in New York. A whole ward of cancer patients currently undergoing chemotherapy have been exposed to it. Imagine fighting cancer for years only to die because some jackass didn’t vaccinate their brat and you caught measles.
STUPID FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT PARENTS
i passed these three guys while walking down the ave and one of them called out “you have pretty eyes!” and another one said “have a nice day!” is this the catcalling of the future because i gotta be real im pretty ok with it
drunkin donuts - songs for your drunk karaoke parties [listen]
1. total eclipse of the heart - bonnie tyler 2. i believe in a thing called love - the darkness 3. sweet caroline - neil diamond 4. come on eileen - dexy’s midnight runners 5. love shack - b-52’s 6. here i go again - whitesnake 7. hey jude - the beatles 8. eye of the tiger - survivor 9. friday i’m in love - the cure 10. dancing in the street - david bowie & mick jagger 11. i’m gonna be - the proclaimers 12. never gonna give you up - rick astley 13. wake me up before you go-go - wham! 14. don’t leave me this way - the communards 15. karma chameleon - culture club 16. we are the world - usa for africa 17. do they know it’s christmas - band aid 18. cars - gary numan 19. i wanna dance with somebody - whitney houston 20. i will survive - gloria gaynor 21. don’t you want me - the human league 22. pour some sugar on me - def leppard 23. house of the rising sun - the animals 24. i was made for loving you - kiss 25. one night in bangkok - murray head 26. dancing queen - abba 27. walk like an egyptian - the bangles 28. hungry like the wolf - duran duran 29. safety dance - men without hats 30. wannabe - spice girls 31. we built this city - starship 32. piano man - billy joel 33. satisfaction - the rolling stones 34. bohemian rhapsody - queen 35. don’t stop believing - journey 36. i don’t wanna miss a thing - aerosmith 37. american pie - don mclean 38. fat bottomed girls - queen 39. wonderwall - oasis 40. tainted love - soft cell 41. livin’ on a prayer - bon jovi 42. come sail away - styx 43. elenore - the turtles 44. born to be wild - steppenwolf 45. all day and all of the night - the kinks 46. bennie and the jets - elton john 47. take on me - a-ha 48. fairytale of new york - the pogues 49. i am the walrus - the beatles 50. thunderstruck - ac/dc 51. born to run - bruce springsteen 52. can’t fight this feeling - reo speedwagon 53. paint it black - the rolling stones 54. school’s out - alice cooper 55. paradise city - guns n’ roses